Parenting

Inter-Religion Marriage

With the changing of times, we are getting more and more open and accepting our fellow human beings precisely on their personal qualities. It’s not any more a Hindu or a Muslim or a White or a Black so to say… well to some extent. 

Inter-religious and Inter-racial marriages are getting equally acceptable and common. However, to be a success, any marriage requires two people who are respecting, responsible, honest and sincere. When two people meet in matrimony, they should respect each other, especially so if it’s an inter-religion marriage. It is very important to remember that all the religions teach the same basic goodness.  

It is very unfortunate, that the religion has become a business and source of power for some and a reason for conflict among people of different beliefs. If we learn to respect others' religion and leave them alone with their preferences, this world will be a happier place.

Over the years, we have spent time or should I say wasted time in proving that a certain somebody’s religion is better. In the process, there are instances, when things have gotten very ugly. We actually do not attain anything by proving our religion better than the others. Do we ever create big fights over proving our spouse better than the others, or our children better than the others? Don’t we all know or believe that our children are the best yet we never try to prove it to others. I personally believe we only want to prove something, which we are not very sure of. If one is sure that his religion is better then there is no need for him to feel inferior about it. That’s the way religion should be we know our religion is better – that’s the reason we have adopted it. It is personal – to each its own.

Religion is a way of life. We by the virtue of being born in a certain religious backdrop learn to follow a way of praying or accepting God as Christ or Krishna and so forth. Thus following the teachings. I don’t see the teachings of Krishna any different than that of Christ. How does it matter then which religion is ancient? 

The second most important factor in an inter-religion marriage is the religion followed by the children. There is a constant hustle in the parents that the child follows his/her religion. Isn’t it more important that a child becomes a good human being? This can be taught to him by adopting the goodness of both the religions. Here, it’s very important for parents not to be selfish. We should focus on teaching the child good values which everyone would agree is the basis of every single religion. There have been instances, when adults abandon the religion given to them by their parents and adopt some other religion that they are convinced is better. I think we should let our children decide what religion they would like to adopt when they are capable of deciding for themselves.

It is very unfortunate, that the religion has become a business and source of power for some and a reason for conflict among people of different beliefs. It is sad but in the past 25 years of our marriage, most of our Hindu acquaintances have looked down upon Christianity and most of our Christian acquaintances have suggested ideas as to how I can convert my husband. 

Unperturbed, we both have learnt to respect each others' individuality, each others religious beliefs, faith and preferences, thereby making our inter-religion marriage a successful one and  this world a little more happier and a harmonious place to live.

True, If we learn to respect others religion and leave them alone with their preferences, this world will be a happier place.

Read the Sequel: More on Inter-Religion Marriage 
 
Read also:  Reflections 

20-Jul-2000

More by :  Meera Chowdhry

Top | Parenting

Views: 3912      Comments: 39



Comment I'm muslim and he is hindu and I didn't change my surname is it possible to carry both of us surname at the same time?

Rohini Khatun
03-Jan-2023 10:13 AM

Comment I am hindu and he's a muslim.we are in relationship since 4years and my parents have problem only with relegion otherwise they are ok for our marriage and we haven't spoke to his parents but we know even they have only relegion problem. We want eachother with our families blessing. Suggest us what to do.

Kaziya
07-Oct-2020 06:23 AM

Comment I'm a hindu girl. And I love the guy who is Muslim above 8 years.. my parents are against for our marriage. How can I convince my parents?? I don't have any ideas about it. If you help me I really really thank you for whole life...

Durga
13-Aug-2020 03:25 AM

Comment Hi, my name is Shayna Khan. I love a guy who is Hindu and I am a Muslim. there is no issue with my family but his family has been strict. please help me.

Shayna
28-Mar-2020 02:49 AM

Comment I am a muslim my age was 26 and he's age was 27 he is hindu our relationship is 9/5 years his parents accept me bt my parents are not accept him they just want me to marry their choice in a same religion my mom always threat me if i'll marry him she going to hurt herself.... He just desperately want to marry me but my mom not agree she just torture me i am depressed what should i do i am not going to marry my parents choice i convinced them a lot but they dont understand my feelings

Tanmin
02-Jan-2020 01:06 AM

Comment Mam I love a Muslim boy who also loves me from past 2 years. We both want to marry each other but as his parents and my parents will be against it.. So we have to live separately which will be not safe as he will be on his job and I will be alone and I m worried about my family.. Is there is any way to convince our parents as we have tried many times to get separated but we can't live without each other.. Mam ur answer will help me a lot as I can't ask this question to any elders


Pooja
12-Dec-2019 05:12 AM

Comment I'm Hindu and my lover is Muslim. How can I convince my parents for our marriage?

Sai priya
05-Jun-2019 08:41 AM

Comment Hi mam,
I m a hindu guy and i love a muslim girl and i want to marry her but my gf parents are fixing her marriage with anyone other and she cant aggee to marrige him but theri parents forcing to marry so plz helpoolzplzz
Thanks you So much

baba
12-Feb-2019 07:56 AM

Comment hi mam.
i am a hindu girl and he is a muslim guy. we are from same age. we have 2 yrs relationship. we have very strong bond between us. his parents already accepted me. my parents also likes my hubby so much bec. for his mixing nature. but they can't accept him as my husband. they are very tipical about caste and relegion regarding marriage. we got marry on 25th aug in court. his parents are very happy with this marriage. but i can't understand how can i convince my parents.plz tell me mam what should i do.

hemalata
09-Sep-2016 06:55 AM

Comment I love a guy but he doesn't want to marry me because we are not of same religion. I am feeling very depressed and can't concentrate on my competitive exams for my career. How much I am trying to get over him but it's causing tremendous pain to me. I feel now that he doesn't even care that much genuinely and whenever we talk now it ends up in fighting. He is doing a good government job and is 27 and I'm 26. Since I started talking about the marriage topic he simply does not want to discuss on it saying that he can't commit on that because he needs long time to settle down. According to him his age of marrying is 32 and being a girl it will be the toughest situation for me. He now barely talks with me and don't even reply my text immediately. I used to text him after office hours usually. But he always says nowadays that he doesn't have time, he is very busy and tired. This kind of responses simply is causing more mental pain to me. I don't know what to do. Because I was habituated with his instant responds towards me always. I really love him and care him more than myself. This is really harming my studies. My brain wants to get over him but my heart is still crying and can't stop loving him. Ours relation was almost 8 years long and we were 19-18 years old then. We came into this relation without any commitment that we won't marry but will love always, but with time with more maturity in this relation I realized that marriage is necessary to be there for each other for life long. I am a muslim and he is a hindu brahmin. He is saying now that he too admits that marriage is important but since our religion is different he can not commit on this as our family will not support it. Please please help me what should I do??? Please help me so that I can stop my life from ruining. Please help me.

Zainab
25-Apr-2016 06:35 AM

Comment Hi Meera,

I'm manish kumar Age- 23, not financially strong, I love a muslim girl from last 6 yrs and now her parents are fixing her marriage their relation. I've done everything to save her.
She is also serious and want to get married but the main reason is i;m not financially strong.
You are requested to please suggest the further steps to be taken.
I can do anything but i have to think abt my family as i m the ONLY bread-earner for my family. Also i cannot live without her.

Manish
24-Feb-2016 07:28 AM

Comment hello,

i am a hindu guy and love with a muslim girl. we are in relation for last 3 years. we are serious for each other and want to get married. the main problem is parents and relatives.

please suggest me some ways, as we dont want to take any wrong step.

thnk u

kartik
26-Jan-2016 08:12 AM

Comment hi..
i m an hindu girl.. i m in love with a muslim boy for past 2 years.. we have a very close bond of betwn us.. v wish to marry each othr.. v knew each othr too gud.. i cant live without him and he cant live without me.. v both r sure of getting married with our parents permission.. towards his family side they knew abt his love.. they are quite ok.. bt thy prefer me to convert my religion.. according to me religion is nt big issue i m 100% ready for that.. but the problem is in my family side.. i dont knew how to open ths to my family.. i m really scared abt ths.. what we have planned is to get register marriage 1st and then v though of letting my parents knew abt ths.. bt i dnt knew whether ths s fair or unfair.. plsss suggest me some ways to convince my parents easily..

abbc
08-Jan-2016 01:33 AM

Comment HI...I m a muslim girl.nd want to marry an hindu boy...is it possible to be married without changing the religion of both of us......plz mail me as soon as possible.

NARGIS
29-Dec-2015 02:17 AM

Comment I am a hindu girl and my lover is a muslim boy .we have been in a relation ship for 10 years.his parents wants him to marry a muslim girl.I cant say to my parents that i want to marry a muslim boy but I dont want him to marry someone else .even he also cant say this to his own parents because he is not willing to someone else .We dont know how to deal with this situation.We have been in a living relationship for 10 years.now its really difficult for us to be apart.Please suggest us how we can overcome this situation.

xyz
02-Dec-2015 04:30 AM

Comment Hi ,

I am muslim and in a relationship with Hindu Girl.. Two girl already left me as i am muslim
and the third one is started thinking about hindu and muslim. my family supporting us but i want yes both side. we have one year and i want to do something big so that no one will suffer as we are. Please suggest from where should i start..Please help me


Regards,

Imtiyaz

imtiyaz
08-Oct-2015 14:40 PM

Comment Kindly please give the answer on the below question:

As I am Hindu and whom I want to marry, she is Muslim, I have question "Is there any Law or Marriage Act in which we can get marriage without changing our religion". Please give the answer.

Anil
27-Mar-2015 06:08 AM

Comment After reading comments sent by different people, i would also like to ask - why only muslim boys love hindu girls while rarely hindu boys love muslim girls?....is there no love inside muslim girls ....only 24 crores muslims are in India but when we see inter-religion love, then find 90 per cent male are muslims....is not it case of love jihad...?

JSK
23-Feb-2015 08:46 AM

Comment Is there any new/latest updates given by Government of India on Special marriage act 1954 ? Under this act if one marriages then that marriage will be considered a legal one?

Nagma khan
23-Jan-2015 05:37 AM

Comment Hi,

I am a documentary film making working on a film for Japnese tv network. I am looking for couples who have faced/still facing opposition on the basis of caste or religion in order to be together. I have been closely working with this delhi based group 'Love commandos' who are helping couples for past few years and have succeeded in bringing a lot of them together and even saving in lot of lives. I ll also be interested in success stories where people on their own fought and now live together happily fighting all odds.

I would like to request people who have posted on this page before like Anwar Ahmed
11/21/2013, Rajender Krishan, Madhu Sudhan Jangid, Thahira etc to drop me a mail at 4strokefilms@gmail.com.

Neel
19-Nov-2014 01:51 AM

Comment Im a muslim girl and im in relationship with an hindu boy.we are same age guys and our parents are against this.my father passed away and i have mom only.After knowng our realiationship mom get tensed and she chaught chest pain.I need both, what i do?can u halp me.

Thahira
31-Oct-2014 08:17 AM

Comment i am a hindu girl love with muslimboy.pls help me how to console my parents??? my parents will not allow me to convert..i need both my boy and my parents.pls help me.my id is shikha.k1990@gmail.com

shikha
17-Sep-2014 13:11 PM

Comment i am a hindu girl love with muslimboy.pls help me how to console my parents??? my parents will not allow me to convert..i need both my boy and my parents.pls help me.my id is ampriya8@gmail.com

priyanka
07-May-2014 11:17 AM

Comment Hi
I am a Hindu girl and I have a 8 yrs relationship with a Muslim guy. We plan on getting married and have told our parents so. Its been 1 year since we told them. They are against it and are making our lives a hell.
I am not willing to convert and my boyfriend supports it.
His parents are keeping and eye on me and seem to know what I am doing and on the other hand my parents are trying to create doubts in my head and taking me to astrologers. No one seems to understand us.
We are afraid that his parents might harm my family or me and might try to ruin our lives(they have told it in many indirect ways to my boyfriend). How do we handle this and make it a happy marriage.

Madhavi
20-Mar-2014 12:25 PM

Comment Can anyone help me to convince her parents, i am muslim and she is hindu and her parents are against this relation and so she wants to leave me, please some one help me....

Ali
31-Dec-2013 01:27 AM

Comment i am a hindu girl,age 21. I love with a muslim guy. Our relation starts in age of 17.i know very wel abt the guy. Our family don't know the relation.i know they didn't agree bec religion. Next april i am going to tel my relation, i am very afraid. I need my family and my lover.tel me some sugection plz

vidya
29-Dec-2013 01:24 AM

Comment Well , as per my all collective knowledge & experience there are only 2 caste on this earth created by GOD one is MALE & other is FEMALE every thing else is a matter of upbringing cultures.
If you think above written word are just lecture then read about me...
My mother is brahman (Pathak) ,My father is muslim (multani shekh) ,My wife is Thakur (Rajput) ,My sister married in rathore family & I have seen /visited hundreds of temples ,gurudwaras & church all over India.
Truly Mera Bharat Mahan

Anwar Ahmed
21-Nov-2013 09:14 AM

Comment Dear me,
our relationship is very truth and we wanna to marry each others..our parents strongly reject due to different religion..we want to marry soon..so please say me some suggestion.. my mail id is ariffa687@yahoo.com

Ariffa
07-Sep-2013 01:05 AM

Comment DEAR MAM.....OUR RELATIONSHIP IS MORE THAN 5YEAR.3 YEAR BACK HER FAMILY MARRIED HER WITH ANOTHER GUY.BUT WITH IN MONTH THEY DECIDE TO SEPRATION.NOW WE WANT TO MARRY.BUT SHE IS CINFUSED.AND WORRY ABOUT HER FAMILY. PLZ PLZ PLZ SUJEST THE BEST SOON.I WANT TO MARRY ONLY WITH HER.PLZ

zuhaib
27-Apr-2013 16:41 PM

Comment m a brahmin. n meh bf is muslim.his parents are not agreed .v tried a lot for our families to end evrything but v r helpless nw.plz help.let me knw wat should he do to convince his parents.bas humse alag nhi hona chahtei .plz help us and give advice

vibha
05-Apr-2013 06:55 AM

Comment Ladki aksar jb uske ghr koi baat hoti hai to wo mujhe drop krne k liye kehti hai......main 5 saal se relationship me hoon...main Muslim or wo Hindu hai

Saif
03-Apr-2013 04:43 AM

Comment Thank you Walter! I am proud to say that in our 37 years of marriage, we have only fought once for religion.

Thank you Swaminathan! It is true and I am an example. One has to practice what he preaches.

I have always felt humans (God's creation) to be more important than any other thing.

Meera.

happy-life
05-Jun-2012 09:32 AM

Comment Very clear views..religion is the way of life..that is the most significant remark you have understood and made! Well done Meera!

G Swaminathan
04-Jun-2012 09:39 AM

Comment Hi, i have never read a piece like this on true intermarriages have a lot of problem but love should cover all since you loved each other before religion if it was so then this world should be more divided than ever all the best and i look forward to more on this since am planning to get marriage soon. BRAVO.

Walter Bwire
02-Jun-2012 02:46 AM

Comment Dear Madhu Sudhan:

You may write to me at meerachowdhry@boloji.net if you need to talk. Meera.

happy-life
08-Feb-2012 18:11 PM

Comment Dear Mam
I want to do intercast marrige. my & her family not support to us...Can do help me ..........Plz
My contact number is 9024727782

Madhu Sudhan Jangid
07-Feb-2012 13:59 PM

Comment Akansha sorry for a late reply...you marry not because ek dusre ki adat padh chuki hai but because you love each other. Love in the end is going to help fight and overcome not only the society but your own future life.

meera. good luck

Meera
21-Nov-2011 15:37 PM

Comment m a brahmin. n meh bf is muslim.its almost 4-5yrs of our relationship.v tried a lot for our families to end evrything but v r helpless nw.plz help.let me knw wat shud v do if v can evn try to end dis relation let dis evn knw cz hum wo b krenge..bas humse alag nhi hua jaa rha..hume ek dusre ki aadat padh chuki hai.plllllllllll help ussss

akansha trivedi
01-Oct-2011 07:07 AM

Comment When the above article was written, we had been married almost 25 years. I am posting this comment (for the benefit of our readers) on the eve of our wedding anniversary (September 25, 2010) when we have completed 35 years of our wedded life. Indeed we quarrel and fight a lot (it keeps us young and energized), but not on religion. Thanks darling for keeping the flame alive.

Rajender Krishan
24-Sep-2010 22:09 PM




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