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by Manjula Waldron Bookmark and Share
 

Mind Conflicts

Child –

Mother, I’m so glad to see you. Finally I found you!
The welcoming look in your eyes touches my heart. It fills me with joy. I run to you eager.

But then I am afraid you will be angry with me for losing my shirt and shoes. Mother dear, please don’t be angry. I wanted to not lose them, but I was so frightened that I had lost you that I panicked. I went looking for you and then I could not find my shirt or shoes.

I know you work so hard to clothe me and give me food, especially since father left. Things have not been easy for you. Mother dear please don’t be disgusted with me. I didn’t mean to be bad, but I get so afraid when I can’t see you. I forget everything. You are my entire world now. You are my life. Please mother, do not worry about money. When I grow up, I promise I will make up for everything. I will buy you a house bigger than uncle Henry bought for his mother. I will buy you a car bigger than Uncle Dave’s. I will grow up and do big things.

Please mother, do not look at my dirty feet and clothes. I will help you clean them. Just continue to gaze at me with your precious, warm hearted, generous smile. Feel my happiness at finding you. Embrace me for who I am, your son. I love you more than my life.

Mother –

Son, I’m so glad to have found you. I’m so relieved, so happy! Come to me, my darling boy, my heart’s desire. What a handsome and refreshing sight you make. I love you more than my life. I was so worried about you. I don’t know what I would have done if I had lost you. That very thought fills me with terror. Look at you, my son, so full of promise – a promise waiting to be fulfilled. You, who have given me meaning and purpose in my life, how can I be without you?

But why do you challenge me so? Where are your shoes and shirt? Look at you! You are so sun-burnt. You will be sore tonight and won’t be able to sleep. I have to go to work to keep food on the table. I do not mind. You are worth every sacrifice I make. You have to go to school to fulfill your promise. We will both be so exhausted. Then we will fight. I don’t like that.

The breeze is so cold. I’ve kept my clothes on. Look at your bare chest? What will I do if you catch a cold? Before you know it, it will be pneumonia, like always, and I will worry all night, hearing your labored breath, whether you will make it through the night. You are all I have. I am petrified of losing you. I have spent the past hour worrying about you. Where have you been? The water is freezing and you have no shoes. Where are they? They were new, we just bought them. How can you be so careless?

I’m so glad to have found you – that joy – no amount of worry can take away. Come to me, my joyful heart.

Gift of Love

Now –

Let’s be present in this moment, locked in our happiness at finding each other. Let’s treasure each other, not for the past, nor the future, but for the present, a divine gift given to us for we have each other.

Where you have been, I will never go
Where you will go I will never be.
In this moment we have come together
Let us cherish each other for who
You are and who I am, no promises made
Cherishing joy of the shared mindful NOW.

We lock our eyes and through them our hearts, those joined in the womb, and expand the universe. The song of the ocean sings in our hearts. The warm sand squishes through our toes anchoring us to the ground. The waves lap at our ankles and leave, but none of these detract us from the love we have.

Eternal

The blue sky smiles at us for we have found each other again. In life we will have many a time when we will be separated, but only for a while, until we find each other again. Age and time will separate us, fading the aged while the young thrives – wholesome. Over time, we will part becoming a memory for each other, happy to be together and a source of blessing when apart. Even when death strikes and the ashes are scattered far and wide in the ocean and the waves take every bit of them, the smile will be emblazoned between the heaven and earth and a gaze will bring it back. The arms will still be waiting patiently to embrace with the same loving come-hither look, blessing with wonder of a love that no force can cast asunder. We have the bond of a mother and son, a bond that transcends eternity. What is the need for fear and anxiety then? It matters not what is said, all that matters is the love that is shared. As we understand each other for our transgressions only the deep feelings that we share in life will remain, impregnating the horizon, all else will be washed away by the surf.   


20-Jan-2006
More by :  Manjula Waldron
 
Views: 896
 
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