From the very beginning of my life I have felt that there is much more to life than what we see or perceive. Yet we are not able to clearly find out what that is. You want someone else to guide you for it.
In the matter of academic education, in the beginning of your life, you join schools which your parents select for you. Later in life, when you are mature enough to form your own judgment, you decide on your own, for the education, you would like to have and what your goals in life are? Here too you are limited in many ways.
Firstly, it depends on where you are born and what facilities are available at that time. Even if the facilities are available, you may not be economically in a position to make use of them. All these are very complex factors and are often so interconnected that one gets baffled with the course of events taking place, on which one has almost no control.
If this happens in the academic field, much more complex it is in the spiritual field. There too first the education is received through one's parents in accordance with their faith and beliefs. But as one grows up, one finds that what one learnt does not agree with one's own ideas. Certain dogmas accepted by one's parents do not agree with one's expanding mind trained on the basis of fresh knowledge acquired through modern science. There starts the conflict. No doubt, the parent's beliefs have a significant influence, but adjustments are made to suit one's own individuality. This is what has continued to happen to me all through my life.
Here I would like to narrate a very special experience that I had sometimes in 1964-65. I was then stationed in Bangalore and was very much interested in spirituality. One Maharaj Charan Singh, the spiritual head of Radha Swami Satsang of Beas in India had come there. Some friend of mine told me that I must go and see him as he was considered to be very spiritual.
I went to meet him and asked, 'Maharaj ji, in every religion it is said that without the will of God, nothing is possible. Not a blade of grass can grow, nor a leaf can move. If that be so, we are all acting according to the will of God. In that case, why does sin attach to man?' He replied, 'Yes, it is absolutely true that nothing moves without the will of God. But when we do something good, we say 'I did it'. When we do something bad, we say 'I did not want to do it but had to, because someone else had done some thing bad to me'. If we do not find anyone else to blame, we say, 'It was the will of God'. So God's will is only for the bad we do, and not for the good? As long as there are two 'I's in you, both sin as well as good will attach. Only if you can remove these two 'I's , neither sin, nor good will attach to you.'
How true were his words? All the clouds of doubts vanished from my mind and I could see the clear light of reason. My next question to him was, 'I want to find a Guru. How to find out who the true Guru is? The first condition of a Guru is 'to obey him blindly. If I get the right person, it will be O.K., but if he was not, I will be lost for ever. How to find the right person?'
To this he replied, 'Guru is never searched as it is not the Diamond that searches the jeweler. It is the jeweler, who searches the Diamond. So one has to become a diamond and the Guru will come to him.' Again it is so true. Diamond and graphite are made of the same element 'Carbon'. To become a diamond, Carbon has to pass through extremely high temperature, pressure and for a long time. So is with us. All the tribulations of the world for time immemorial are the pressures and high temperatures through which we have to pass before we can become diamonds. No shortcuts! No Gurus.