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I opened up the 
book of my life 
to him 
and exposed its 
each and every page. 

I read out to him loud and clear 
the page of my virtues 
the page of my talents 
the page of my strengths 
the page of my joys and 
the page of my sorrows. 

I did not even think of 
or consider 
covering up and hiding 
the page of my struggles 
the page of my vices and 
the page of my weakness. 

I also without hesitation 
read him aloud the 
chapters of my pain and 
my loneliness 
chapters of my confusion 
and my unmet expectations. 

I could do that only when 
I had taken off the armour of 
my fear and 
my securities 
and I was fully aware that 
I was making myself vulnerable to 
judgment 
humiliation 
embarrassment 
shame and 
rejection. 

I had a lot at stake. 
But even then it was 
a risk I wanted to take. 
It was a risk worth taking. 

For if I won 
I would be showered with 
an unconditional love and 
the bliss that comes with it. 
And even in defeat 
I would win an opportunity 
of exposing me to myself. 
For in the process of opening up 
the book of my life 
and reading it to someone else 
I would myself read it 
page by page 
chapter by chapter 
and would know myself 
better and closer 
and thus win myself 
the love from me. 

(c) Meenakshi Madhur
Australia
July 20, 2000

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