Society & Lifestyle
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Our Children Are Not Safe
|by Prof. Shubha Tiwari|
Continued from Satyameva Jayate: A Truly Cathartic Experience
India is a pedophile’s heaven. There’s no law to prevent this crime. People don’t talk about it. Every one pretends as though nothing like child sexual abuse exists in this country. As the proverb goes, the danger won’t go if the pigeon shuts down its eyes. The cases are very common. The uncle, the social-worker, the tutor, the teacher, the principal, the grandfather, the neighbor- anyone can be a pedophile. The horror is that they have a charming, commanding personality. They attract children. They win the confidence of parents very quickly. The demon is rather sweet in appearance. However, what he does is not at all sweet. They physically abuse children; subject them to brutal physical pain; and mar their mentality forever.
The show was a classic in its own right. The research shows that 53% children suffer from child sexual abuse. In our great country, every second child is a victim of child sexual abuse. No wonder, there’s so much negativity, cynicism and an overgrown instinct to pull others down. We don’t have normal children. How can we have normal adults? Suffering and pain are all too natural here. Victimization is the natural thing. 21% children suffer horrible cruelties, which are impossible to be articulated while 32% suffer ‘mildly’. The ‘milder’ crimes are kissing, touching at objectionable area, showing porn etc. Even the ‘milder’ ones are not at all ‘mild’ for me.
We think that our children are safe in homes. And we are also very proud of our joint family system. A joint family is the ideal setting for a pedophile. Ironically, home and school, the two most common habitats for hapless kids are the most common places for the crime. For Anamika, her tormentor was her tutor who winning her parents’ confidence, exploited her when she was a mere six years’ old child. The parents never wanted to disturb the child in her studies. The pedophile ravaged her body for seven long years. Cindrella’s life was also that of a fairy tale till her childhood was destroyed.
The best lines came from an expert who, when asked, ‘Should we respect our elders?’, replied, ‘No, we should not respect elders blindly. We should respect good behavior.’ If the behavior of an elder is not good, we must protest. There’s double victimization when such cases are referred as rape cases before victimized children. The parents must learn to listen. The criminal would say that it is a game that he’s playing with kids; would scare them into silence. In fact, silence is part of the crime.
Dr. Rajesh Mitra, on the basis of his research, gave very revealing clues about the psychology of pedophiles. Pedophiles have no sense of regret. They don’t believe that they are doing anything wrong. They, in their perverted minds, are giving pleasure to children. There’s no sense of guilt. They study the environment of the child. They assess the child’s vulnerability and go about the crime in a planned manner. We cannot recognize the devils by their faces. The onlt discerning behavioral pattern is an adult’s excessive interest in children. If we recall, we would pin point people in marriage ceremonies or family gatherings who are labeled as children’s choice, ‘Arre, voh to bachcho ke sath hi khelta rahata hai.’ Such people are dangerous.
Parents must educate their children. Parents must take steps, believe their children, observe the people around their children, and confront the criminal directly. Being a parent is a responsibility. A fragile life is the care of her/his parents. Parents must protect their children.
There are people who spontaneously support good efforts; there are people who keep looking at the loopholes, the gaps. Let’s be of the former type.
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