Damp Topic by G Swaminathan

Damp Topic

by G Swaminathan

The recent installment of ‘Satymev Jayate’ treated once again the topic of male chauvinism in terms of ‘Domestic Violence’. It was not much different from that of the dowry episode where a couple of submissive victims and a rebel who have been subjugated by physical violence by their husbands to the point of breaking the marriage.

The provisions in laws available for such victims are once again highlighted by a superintendet of police and the reasons were analyzed by a counseling person and Azad Foundation which helps such deserted women to find a living figured in the program.

If Aamir Khan is designing his program mainly to impress women viewers, it is his choice and prerogative. But, here definitely a few points to be mentioned especially on this topic.

‘Domestic Violence’ the main part being wives manhandled mercilessly by their husbands is in existence time immemorial in India. It has been accepted as part of everyone’s life by both men and women. In the program itself you saw no men felt ashamed of wife beating.

The immense viewership and patronage given to all those ‘Saas-Bahu’ serials and ‘manly’ movies where ‘taming of the shrew’ directly relate to this aspect. Though physical abuse is bad both on the grounds moral and ethical aspects, as long as women are ready to swallow such insults and abuse it is hardly possible for any outsider to offer judgment in such cases.

The major concerns here are the submissiveness of the women because of financial constraints and the effect of such brutalities on the children who get affected by the acts. But, days have changed. There are many divorcees and single parents today in the middle and upper middle class. In the lower class wife beating is a common affair and draws least attention.

A decent, dignified, educated, well employed woman colleague of mine who had been subjected to very serious domestic tortures by her late alcoholic husband still keeps him at high esteem in her mind. It was both shocking and surprising to me since she said that she had never even divulged the difficulties she had gone through in the early life to her two sons who are now grown up and well placed. Amazing, isn’t it? That is probably our typical ‘Bharatiya Nari’!

We always feel proud of our cultural anchors and belief in destiny. ‘Domestic Violence’ and ‘Male Chauvinism’ are integral parts of that. If Aamir Khan had chosen this as a serious societal malaise, I am sorry, he is wrong.

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17-Jun-2012

More by : G Swaminathan

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Comments on this Article

Thanks for replying... But , your reply only bewildered my thoughts and nothing else. Let me tell you one thing very frankly, when a person digs out the social issues, we all know this is the same melodrama from past 50 years or even more than that pre-independence. We know that such culture doesn't hold any relevance today. So, why not we try to remove the diseases from our culture which are proving to be a leprosy for some section of our society especially to women in our country.

Actually, you are true in one thing, what about those things where one women brutally assault another women. You know this is the mind of women in our country, we are brought up from childhood by our mother saying "beta sasuraal jaana hai, saara kaam seekh le, warna wahan jaake thukwana mat". This we usually listen in everyone's household. What happens when a girl goes to some other home to accept the brutality for dowry or husband's acting like superior to females.
We all know that women like saas always want their daughter in law to follow their footsteps and their sufferings. No one wants a women to go ahead. This is the disease patronizing the older women's thought as well as already making men sick of it.

You know what Khan wants to show is why There are so many rape cases in Haryana? Women are now selling like vegetables in these states from outskirts from our country. Is that culture we are talking about. I only want to justify one thing, someone big or a celebrity level must dig out this issue so that people talk and think about it again.

Our Nehru, Gandhiji, Lal BhadurShastri did all the efforts for bringing up women to fight for independence otherwise we would have crippled as slave for many years by Britishers.
Women can contribute a lot to our country's economy and a healthy women can serve her home, her family best than those crippled by the society's norm under domestic violence.

You told me that you will be sorry for what I thought that this show will bring some change. To provide a wider aspect, this show is actually making some changes in people's lives. Earlier, we never used to discuss such topics so easily, we just used to read newspaper and say " Oh my god" " WHat the Hell". Now, women are getting educated and more brave. So, one should take a stand to change the society. A society can't change by one show but even a spark can trigger the fire you know.

Instead of criticizing the hype created by show. Support the causes so that even you become the part of a new changed India which provides equal and healthy living opportunity to men and women.

"kam se kam koi to hai jo is baare mein soch raha hai and stand le raha hai". Jo kar raha hai aisa, use naa koso yaaro, samaj se bimariyan hatao aur desh ko aage badhao yaaro"

Surekha Kumar
06/20/2012 01:58 AM

Thank you Ms Surekha Kumar for your ferocious remarks on my review of this week's 'Satyamev Jayate'. It once again reinforces the fact how Indian women are naive and believe in superficial cosmetic touches. You seemed to be well educated which could be seen from your writing but you are unable to distinguish between the sarcasm and what I actually try to convey through my comments.

You make a statement that businessmen, professors etc are brutally abuse their wives. Who prevent those wives to raise their hands and give a slap like Shanno Begum? It is your 'so called' culture and belief in destiny. I pointed out that only. You feel that Indian women are not aware of domestic violence before Aamir Khan's dramatic presentation? We all know and we still just watch one more episode like all women watch saas-bahu serials. Why even the Indian women do not raise their voices against such serials where one woman is brutally attacking another woman? Does it not amount to domestic violence? Ahem, probably Mr Khan would have reserved that topic for his next episode.

Please understand I appreciate his efforts to bring out certain positive aspects among the minds of the public in a couple of episodes. But this particular topic and discussion was something like flogging a dead horse. Who created the socalled Indian culture? It is only we the Indians.Do you think that Indian women will change their attitude after seeing this show by anyway? If you also feel so, I can only feel sorry for you.

G Swaminathan

G Swaminathan
06/19/2012 13:50 PM

Are you PROUD of your Indian culture where Male Chauvinism and Domestic Violence exists? Then I should say stop respecting your mother or stop worshiping goddess Durga idol. Who made the society, we as a people made this society. This is quite ironic to know that the same mentality is of yours who is writing this blog. Women who gave birth to you should be beaten up because it is the integral part of our society. Who the hell made this norm? Please introduce him to me. Those women who love their husband whole-heartedly sometimes compromise on the basis of their children. Children can't live without their mothers and this you also know very well.

I have seen in front of my homes, professors and big businessmen used to brutaly abuse their wives. Those who have illiterate or are less educated can't even step out of their home on the basis of the suspicion. One of the educated one left his husband's home. But, do you really think this is a integral part of our society. Actually, this is a disease. Let me tell you one thing, just consider that you have a daughter who gets married and then, her husband beat her up badly. What you will have to say for that? Will you tell her no dear, go back, you have to bear this or you will pull her back.. This male dominating society can never provide a fair judgement to the females... I am ashamed of your thinking.... " ruka hua paani badbu maarne lagta hai:" . Our culture and this disease is growing in that stagnant water only. Think again before commenting.

Surekha Kumar
06/19/2012 12:05 PM

Bollywood members have developed their own understanding of India, Indian culture and Indian social system. And one can observe through various interviews, comments etc. they make that their understanding is very shallow.

What Amir Khan is doing is another example of this shallow and twisted understanding. As I put it in comment of another article a few weeks back, the topics being covered in 'Satyamev jayate' are old, I had seen similar stories in Doordarshan some 20-25 year ago. May be his team picked up those items in search of topics and then fit into it some real time examples !

I want to ignore Amir Khan for creating such a useless show, that itself does nothing else but sensitization of issues deeply and scarcely rooted in current social norms and customs. Out of seven, I watched one episode that too for first 45 mins as it did not interest me beyond that.

As I highlighted before, he will never raise the issues happening next to his door - for example teenage sex in Mumbai and other metros. Reason - the bollywood members don't look at this issue as a social illness.

In fact, if such an issue is taken up, he will be forced to dig some immediate causes of it, and bollywood movies and Hollywood movies are one of those causes. If I were broadcasting minister at central govt, I would have stopped this show long back. There is no point in airing something that does not help anyone, but fuels inferiority complex in masses indirectly.

Dinesh Kumar Bohre
06/18/2012 12:36 PM

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