Bringing Up Parents

Nurturance, Love, Care, Trust, Understanding, Right-morals etc. are some of the qualities which come to the human mind when thought or connected with the term "parent." However the term isn't as simple in reality as it looks. Parents are supposed to take well care of the children, by promoting his/her physical, motor, psychological, emotional, social health etc. Parents are supposed to educate the child and make him suitable to fight against various forces thereby, proving him/herself powerful in the world outside home. Their children are, but obviously connected with the only monitory support that is from the parents till the time the child is able enough to earn his/her own bread and butter and support his/her living. Are these statements written somewhere? Why are such so- called duties taken for granted? Probably, for the reason that some parents continue to stick to "these" duties at the cost of personal -social life to hear from their children afterwards-" No big deal, everyone does it, nothing different."

However, today inspite of stepping into the twenty first century, equipped with the latest technologies etc. one could conclude by saying that, " the scenario today has changed in comparison to the previous years." BUT, has it really? I clearly mean in terms of the human mind-set! It is a very individualistic concept as to how would one rate his/her parents in the priority list. Some do give them the first priority letting the parents take on personal life decisions etc. forgetting how irrational they could be? It is said that education leads to more knowledge which further leads to making rational decisions in life, But, how well or right are the educated parents today??

Continuing with the same age-old practice of child labor, childbirth, flesh-trade and child terrorists one has happily entered in the new millennium! Eagerly enough, laws against many of these were laid years back, but still it continues to exist and will do so till the human race prevails! It might just sound sad, but, probably the care-givers of these people were themselves not educated enough to take the right decisions or probably belonged to the " same profession." These groups of people clearly suffered economically in addition to the lack of right knowledge.

But, what about the educated set-up in various metropolitan cities of India.

Has education helped people to crawl up to right directional answers? The answer for the majority is No! There continues to exist the mental block in the "educated-parents" mind pertaining specially to the status of the female child. Many such "educated- communities" do emphasize on marriage after 18 years etc. The girl is made to realize time and again that she is a "visiting-member" of the house and that she has to get settled somewhere else. Some are also beaten and battered, if the guardian finds out about some connection with the opposite-sex. Similarly, phone calls, meetings etc. from the opposite-sex are a big No, No in most educated well-settled families of the country even today!

Similar things are happening in the so called "poor-community" or the deprived community as well! So where lies the difference? Probably yes- The money, status etc. Therefore, money does act as an essential driving force for the society division irrespective of the very similar thoughts and ideas for the ages together! Surprisingly enough, there does exist the matrilineal Khasi-community of Meghalaya (India) wherein the women though performs all the menial tasks, has the highest status order in the family as men while away their time in the liquor shops, tea stalls etc.

However, the status of the girl-child in most good families is still not very satisfactory. The parents continual comparisons with siblings, relatives and expectations that their child should be an "outshining-star" in the family leads such growing people no where except for indulging in unfair socially prohibited relations, alcohol-drug abuse etc.

Thus, children so called "Father of the man" or "Future of the country" continue with the same practices with their children as well, however, some do act differently by taking a step forward and saying "what happened with us should not happen with our child." Again the percentage for such people is very low.

Hence, a vicious circle is created, which has to be broken by both the child and the parent for the betterment of the society. The parent has to change him/herself in the changing world and therefore get a change in the child too, so that we can atleast for once be proud of the fact that Adam and Eve ate the apple and that the human race started!     


More by :  Khushboo Bhola

Top | Parenting

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