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Our Young Adults
|by Meera Chowdhry|
Most of our young adults have this complaint that their parents do not understand them.
Unfortunately most of us do not want to accept that our children are adults and are very normal. They are attracted towards the opposite sex and they need to get involved. As also they start their search for that special someone they plan to spend their life with.
We Indian parents do not want to understand this. We are afraid, getting involved would mean distraction from studies or situation could get ugly in some other ways. It is true we have distinct values but if we were able to talk to our children and explain to them things in the required details, they would not disappoint us. However, we cannot fight with the nature. Also some of us parents did not think in this direction due to our upbringing and pressure from our own parents. There should be no reason why we should not accept the realities and let our children go through the natural process with a little less pressure.
Most of the parents are very liberal in every other aspect except when it comes to child's love life. It is often found that resultantly children often take refuge in lying. That trip to the library may be a trip with a boy or a girl friend. Irony is most parents know what is going on in the child's life yet we find it very hard to accept. We love our children very much and we would like to be there for them always.
A child needs the love and support of a parent in these critical years. That feeling of dejection could be very depressing for a child if he is not able to establish a relationship he wants. At a time like that we need to be there to make him feel good about himself, thus not suffer with any kind of complexes.
It is time for us Indian parents to understand that the arranged marriage is not the only key word. If we are more open and understanding with our kids, they can be guided well and they will certainly bring home that someone you think is right for them.
I remember 25 years ago when I took my man home my mom only said, "I gave you good values and I am sure you are making a right choice."
Isn't it time for us to trust our training!
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