Society & Lifestyle
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|by Dr. Sirisha Dabiru|
It was 7pm and I was waiting for my train to arrive on the platform. After 20minutes or so I heard the announcement that the train is coming on platform no. 3. So, I rushed from platform no.1 with my heavy bag. I think I was coolly settled in the train by 7:30pm. Some persons were standing outside bidding farewell to their dear ones. In the meanwhile I saw a couple entering the coupe with 7,8 flowerpots and other stuff. Later on I have realized that they have reserved a separate berth for their luggage. Our coupe was looking like a nursery with red, yellow, pink roses and some decorative plants....
Slowly people started interacting with each other. Including me 9 people were present in that mini nursery. Out of 9 persons, 7 were Andhrites. So, they were happy to know each other. I was a silent observer. During the conversation, I came to know that this nursery couple is from Vishakapatnam and both of them love to decorate their house with artificial and natural plants ....Oh, yes! they were having some plastic flowers too. Looks like they are very rich. That lady was wearing 17-18 tulaas (tulaa=16grams) of gold jewelry. But, she has got a funny voice. In fact it was not audible. I felt as if I was listening to an old cassette which got corrupted... Her husband is a gentleman and was talking to his friend. One middle-aged lady was sitting beside this nursery couple... I felt that she is one chatter box... She kept on telling about her family. She is proud to tell that both her daughter and son are in US and she has taken voluntary retirement and is now enjoying her life by chatting with her kids on computer.
A young girl and a young chap were sitting on the side lower berth. Their reservation status was RAC. So, they had to share one berth. A non-stop discussion was going on between them after they got introduced to each other. As I was engrossed in writing something, I didn't pay much attention to their conversation. But, in between I could hear a word repeatedly - "marriage". She was telling that guy with what kind of person she would like to get married. He was patiently listening to her. She was speaking in a stylistic manner. If you just listen to her voice, you feel that film actress Shilpa Shetty is speaking. Although this girl is good looking she can not be compared with that damsel beauty...
This way our journey was going on smoothly in that small nursery... I finished my work by 10:30pm and was feeling little hungry... So, I started munching "Lehar Kurkure". All of a sudden I heard - " Oh! my wife!". I was a bit shocked because those two people got introduced a few hours back and that guy has uttered this phrase... I was like "Oh! my God!"... At that moment I felt people are very fast... Then in the next moment I realized that just by listening to a small phrase, we should not come to any conclusion.... I understood this when he completed his sentence- "Oh! my wife also likes lipsticks a lot...". Here I forgot to mention that this girl is also fascinated with lipsticks. That guy continued - "In fact my wife asks me to get lipstick wherever I go. She is also fond of jewelry, dresses and other cosmetics... She used to spend lot of money for all these things before marriage. As she stopped working after our engagement, I used to give her money to buy this stuff.... ".
Then, this girl said - " You know! there is a time for every thing.... People don't spend money for such things throughout their life...."
This guy agreed - "Yeh, you are right... It happens when there is an air of festivity"
During their conversation I came to know so many things about them. This guy is an Andhrite and stayed in Maharashtra right from the time when he was born. Although this girl is a Maharashtrian, she stayed in Hyderabad from her childhood. Her dad hails from a poor family and he came to Hyderabad with two pairs of dresses and a few books when was in search of a job... Later on he worked hard and now he has got every thing in life - gaadi (car), bangla (house)....". This girl happens to be his second daughter. Somehow she was neglected by him. He never bothered to know her wishes / interests etc. But, now he wants to show his love for her by marrying her off into a rich family... But, she is not satisfied with this... She always wanted his affection...
During their conversation, she had asked this guy - " How do you feel to be married?"
He said - " Good! I am happy... Although life is not the same ... When you are a bachelor, you enjoy your life with your friends and have lots of freedom. But, I feel nice to be married. In fact, I love my wife a lot.."
"Oh! is it? How did you meet her?"
"In fact, my mom was tired of finding alliances for me. She finally said -' beta (my dear son)! I will approve the girl whomever you like. Please get married'. I never used to like the girls whomever she showed me. I met my wife for the first time in my office. She used to sit in a different cluster. When I saw her for the first time, I felt like getting married to her. I think I was very lucky. By the time my mom met her, every thing was fixed and we got married... My wife is not very pretty... But, she is very nice. Everyone in my family pampers her. She is a deshasth brahmin (Maharashtrian) and I am a Telugu guy..."
This girl was amazed to hear all these things....
This guy asked her - " Would you go for a love marriage or an arranged marriage?"
"As such I do not have any objections for love marriage. But, I would prefer to go for an arranged marriage. I don't want to go against to my parents' wishes. I feel that we don't gain any thing by protesting / hurting them."
"Are your parents very conservative?"
"I feel they are a mixture of both.... They are conservative in some matters and at the same time they are broad-minded too!"
"I think your parents are right. That is how they are balancing.."
"Yeh! I feel that I can make any kind of marriage (love/arranged) successful..."
"Yes! I am sure you will...."
"Oh! thank you. But, how come you are so confident?"
"Because you resemble my wife in many ways. Even she was warned by many people that if she marries me (who doesn't belong to her caste), she will be thrown out of her community and that she will have to face lot of problems. But, she was confident and she had won everyone's heart in my family..."
"Oh! that's nice.."
Afterwards the train was moving so fast that, I couldn't listen to them. But, I was thinking- " How people can become friends in such a short period and can share so many things. I felt that is how modern generation makes difference by being broad-minded and at the same time they are very understanding and give respect to their parents' feelings. In olden days a boy and a girl never used to talk / share so many things... Rather they were
very hesitant. But, now things have changed. Modern generation loves to communicate and share its thoughts with others in whatever little time they get in this computer era... Probably they believe in sharing....."
As the roses were giving some pleasant odor, I didn't know when I have invited deep sleep....
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