Brevity is Bliss
A popular speaker realized that his hour-long speeches rendered the audience rather restive. He instructed his secretary to restrict the text duration to 15 minutes in the future.
On the next occasion the speech again lasted over an hour, amidst pandemonium.He called the secretary and shouted at him for the repeated mishap.
The secretary replied, "Sir, it was a 15-minute speech, and as usual four copies of it --- one for you, and one each for the press, your personal file, and the guard file.
An Experience as a Medical Student.
As a medical student our Anatomy Professor expected us to wear a clean, white, knee-length apron for his morning classes. Once one of my classmates did not have a clean apron available, so he wore one of his white bush-shirts, and sat in the third row.
The Professor entered the theater, looked around, and angrily shouted, "You fourth from right in the third row, get up, where is your apron?
My mate stood up and sheepishly said, "This is my apron, but it has shrunk".
In vain, my mate had to leave the class immediately.