Dec 02, 2023
Dec 02, 2023
Many times, I used to feel that ‘Life is Unfair’ to me. Yes. Not just me; I have come across many people saying this and feeling bad. While I cannot speak for others, I think I can speak for myself. This is obviously by comparing my life with that of X, Y or Z. Some may be known and close to me, some may be just acquaintances, some are totally alien to me.
We see the children born to the same parents all do not have similar qualities or lives; but, in many cases nearly of equal education and status. But, I consider it very rare. Once I came across a full page ad by a gentleman sharing his birthday happiness with all his children in different parts of the world with enviable positions. Such cases may be rare but in the present day situations it is quite common and possible.
I felt unfairness when I was some 12 years old. The two prizes I won in the school’s Bharathiar Competition (one for oratory and another for singing!) only announced but not given. I realized the unfairness when I lost distinction in my M Tech because I missed it by just 4 marks. I felt the same when my short story in a famous weekly got only a consolation prize though it dealt with the importance of education and agriculture while the first prize story was the millionth one on widow remarriage. I was wild of the unfairness when I was not given the promotion once to the next cadre notwithstanding the fact I have done several projects and brought funds to the institute. In my personal life, which I don’t want to discuss, I have come across the glaring unfairness on several instances.
But, is there any meaning in feeling and analyzing why this unfairness in life?
Absolutely not. I surfed the net and got several quotes on the fairness of life. That showed the actual meaning of life apart from its ‘fairness’ or ‘unfairness’.
‘Life isn’t fair, so you play the best game you can with the cards you ‘re dealt.’
‘Don’t complain of life’s unfairness; It is never fair – at best it is impartial.’
‘How do you measure someone’s life? By the scope of their accomplishments, or the number of people they have touched, or by the width of a hand? None of it seemed fair. None of it seemed like enough.’
‘Life isn't always fair, but that's irrelevant. All that matters is that you figure out where you want to be, hold your head high, and keep moving forward.’
‘Fair or Unfair’, life just goes on. Your judgment or grieving are irrelevant.’ That is the lesson I finally learnt. Once I was talking to one of my friends and his wife when mentioning a film and a character I said ‘I didn’t like the film, because a good character faces all unfairness in life.’ Pat came the rejoinder from my friend’s wife who is much younger than me; ‘Why do you expect life to be fair to everyone?’ I was stunned.
After seeing several people and their lives around me I came to the following conclusion; no two lives can be the same or similar. Each one of us is born for some purpose or no purpose. Still we continue with the hope expecting a better tomorrow or future. Expecting ‘fairness’ or ‘justice’ in life is nothing but naivety. Period.
More by : G Swaminathan