“The son-in-law of the house takes the place equal to the eldest son of the family. The eldest son is next to the father. If you don’t take it up, how can this marriage be celebrated?” Lakshmirajam, the younger uncle asked.

Mittapalli Ravindra did not speak up nor nod his head.

Ravindra came up the different way. He did not amass any wealth. He was not even the headmaster of the high school. He was working as a school assistant.

His relations and friends think that Ravindra occupied a high position and desire that he should help everyone. It is difficult to run a family on the salary of one person. If four or five families expect him to help them, to what extent can he help anyone? He grew very angry.

“What did brother-in-law Sekhar say when I kept him in my house and educated him till the tenth class? Did he not say that he was made to work like a servant and was fed very little? If he had been my own younger brother or son, would he have said like that? What all I spent on him and his food all these years was brushed aside with a few words. Those who speak nice words are good people. What I have done so far is enough. For how many more years have I to fend people? I’ll shift from teaching Telugu to Sanskrit teaching. Sanskrit teaching has better prospects. It is said, “Jamata dashama graham.” If Shani is the ninth planet, the son-in-law of the house is the tenth planet. That is what I also feel”.

Everyone laughed.

When Mittapalli Ravindra was married, the family of the in-laws was comfortably placed. His father-in-law, Siliveru Lingam, was busy weaving handloom clothes and printing colors and was friendly with everyone.

In course of time the handlooms fell in disuse as there was no demand. There was no work.

Siliveru Lingam started a tea stall in front of his house. That too did not run. He fell sick and suffered from ailments. No one took the trouble to get him medical help. He passed away uncared for. There was no evidence to show it as death because of hunger.

“How could you say so, son? If you stand on our side and support us, the programme can be gone through.” Lakshmavva, the bride’s grandmother held the hands of Ravindra and shook him by the shoulder. She pleaded and requested him. She shed tears.

“Who knows about that Sanskrit, son? It is Telugu that is spoken in our homes. We only know about the saying that the son-in-law of the house is equal to the eldest son of the house. What do we know about what you said after talking about the proverb, son, said the younger sister of his father-in-law, Saroja.

“What is the use if you say you don’t know? It is only with those Sanskrit mantras marriages are performed. They say, how it is possible without the Brahmin? It is they who said that Jamata is the tenth planet! Then, why do they say ‘no’ to this?”

“What do we get if we remember things of the past, son? Are women marrying five husbands because Droupadi had five husbands? Do women now move with many men if they don’t have children as Kunti of older times gave birth to a child to each person? If we try to escape like that, how can we perform this girl’s marriage? Is she not like your daughter? Is she not like your younger sister? If you had another younger sister, would you not perform her marriage? Why don’t you think in such terms? Perform this important function by taking responsibility. You will be blessed. People will remember you.”

“Yes, yes. Everyone remembers it – for every festival, he takes his elder sister and brother-in-law to his place with regularity,” said Ravindra sarcastically.

“Is his life also a life? Should he be discussed? Is he a son! – is he a man? you have done much. He has not that much of gratitude.” Lakshmavva and Rajeswari said at the same time.

“Look here, atta* – whatever he does, a son is a son. However much a son-in-law does, he remains a son-in-law. There is a poem which runs ‘the goodness of a son-in-law… The meaning of the poem is that there is nothing like the goodness of a son-in-law in this world. What is the result of all my good deeds? It was all dismissed with a few words, with a proverb.”

It was long ago that Siliveru Lingam, Padmavathi’s father, passed away. Padmavathi was the first-born child of the family and as Ravindra was the eldest son-in-law of the family, he had to bear the responsibilities also. Padmavathi’s eldest brother, Rajesh, was running power looms in Bhivandi and making his living. The younger Sekhar also was to go to Bhivandi. When Sekhar cried out saying he would study, Padmavathi requested Ravindra and kept Sekhar with her in their house.

They educated Sekhar as long as he showed interest in studies. He did teacher training. He married his classmate whom he liked. His mother was averse to the marriage, but Ravindra somehow convinced her and the marriage was celebrated… That was all. Later they stayed there in the guise of a job.

The mother remained at home. Sekhar did not invite his mother or younger sister. He did not also say ’no’ to them. His wife does a small job. She cannot tolerate her mother-in-law or her sister-in-law. These people also do not go to them.

“I do not know how these proverbs have been made, son-in-law! In a hundred there will be one who teases. These are proverbs made to state that everything should belong to the sons. After the marriage, the daughter and son-in-law do not get anything except a saree or a towel and a few gifts for a festival. Yet the son-in-law is blamed. Let the man who throws the blame be cursed. If the daughters are given all the things equally with the sons, there would be no problems. But people thought that everything should belong to the son. The sons alone should live comfortably. The parents themselves do not treat their daughter well. Till the girl is married off they make her work like a laborer. After marriage she has to work in the house of the in-laws. When did a woman live happily, tell me son!”

Grandmother Lakshmavva remembered her past. Tears rolled down her eyes.

The happy message that the boy liked the girl made Ravindra the central figure. As the get-together between the two families was arranged in their house, everyone thought that Ravindra would take up all other responsibilities also. But everyone was surprised when the eldest daughter and the son-in-law washed their hands clean.

An elderly person belonging to the family of the boy telephoned. He told them that the boy liked the girl and if the gifts were given as agreed to already by them, the marriage could be celebrated on the auspicious day already fixed. Padmavathi, Ravindra’s wife, received the call.

The marriage of Sadhana, Padmavathi’s younger sister, could be settled after trials for three years. Padmavathi was very happy with the message received on the phone. She informed all the relatives on phone even before Ravindra returned from school. Next day being Sunday, all the relatives gathered at Ravindra’s house. 

Ravindra educated his brother and sister with great difficulty. Ravindra’s younger sister, Navya, was working as a teacher. He celebrated her marriage the previous year. Padmavathi kept quiet thinking that it would not be proper if she raised the topic of her sister’s marriage before the marriage of her husband’s sister. It will take nearly two years for them to clear the loan raised for the marriage through installments. Padmavathi knew the situation. So, she was in a dilemma as to what she had to do for her sister’s marriage. 

In the meanwhile, unexpectedly, the marriage of Padmavathi’s sister was settled. The marriage was settled after trying for three long years. Padmavathi’s mother and grandmother were worried that if the opportunity was lost, it would be very difficult to find another match. They also knew that even if it meant borrowing money, it was possible only for the son-in-law to manage it. After the marriage, the loan can be cleared somehow. If the marriage was off now, it would be impossible to find another groom. That was their worry.

Sadhana, Ravindra’s wife’s sister, was younger than his sister, Navya, by a year. Sadhana had to stop her education midway for want of finances. Ravindra wanted to educate Sadhana also.

At the time of the death of Ravindra’s father-in-law, Sekhar, who was studying eighth class, came to stay with his sister.

Sadhana also passed intermediate. She was working as a teacher in a school. She earned six hundred rupees a month. If she rolled beedis, she would earn more. But she was eager to be known as a teacher. Her eagerness resulted in spending half her salary on sarees and getting them ironed. 

Padmavathi and Ravindra realized that they have to think of their own family also. They felt bad within themselves that everyone took help from them speaking good words, but no one thought of helping them a little…

Padmavathi expressed her predicament in words. 

“So many of you are asking only my husband to take up the responsibilities. What will you lose, if every one of you extend a helping hand…” she started saying.

Everyone fell silent hearing Padmavathi. It is easy to say things. When the daughter of the house herself spoke up in a tone of retaliation and not the son-in-law, no one could say anything. Padmavathi’s younger sister, Sadhana the bride, turned her head towards her elder sister with painful looks. Tears welled into her eyes when she heard her sister, whom she loved more than her mother, say it.

Padmavathi observed her sister’s reaction, took her closely and placed her hand on Sadhana’s shoulder. It looked as though she said, ‘I am with you dear, don’t cry.’ Yet tears dropped from the eyes of Sadhana.

“Everyone will be happy at the mention of marriage. But this girl is weeping. If all of you help, it is not difficult. How is it possible for the son-in-law to bear all the weight? Chinnayana, contribute two tulas of gold as your share for the mangala sutra,” said Padmavathi.

With this suggestion, the discussion took a new turn. Any number of duties may be assigned to others. They are just words, now the mouths have got shut. Words are easy to utter. But when it comes to actual practice in deeds, they became selfish and withdrew into their shells like the turtle.

“What do we have with us to sell? We do not even have the brass vessels gifted to us at the time of marriage. We don’t have anything except lead vessels and a few steel glasses. We have been living in darkness for three months as we have no money to pay electricity bills.”

Everyone began to narrate their tale of woe and about their debts. They remembered how they became poorer financially as time passed during these thirty years. The olden days were better. They had some kanjee to drink to satisfy their hunger. Now life has become miserable. Even if they wanted to work, there were no jobs. Even if they made attempts, there was no result. Tears filled their eyes.

Ravindra also did not know why the times changed in this manner. Industries came up; the handicrafts as well as caste professions took a beating. They ceased to be profitable. The cost of raw materials shot up. With globalization and famines, life became miserable.

Everything was available in the shops. There was no money in the pockets. There was no work to be taken up. The factories were being closed, sending the workers away on voluntary retirement. The lands of the factories were being sold for the construction of houses in plots and crores of rupees were being earned. Why is the life of the common man becoming miserable? The farmers are using tractors and proclaines on rent and running their cultivation. Laborers are finding no work.

Instead of digging wells, borewells came into use. Handloom clothes gave way to mill cloth. The cobbler’s chappals had been replaced by sandals sold by companies. Bullock carts were disappearing. Autos, lorries and buses were making their appearance. In these circumstances, how should the old-world villagers live and what work will they do? Those around Ravindra wept, thinking of the changes that had taken place. Ravindra tried to console them, explaining the reasons to the best of his knowledge for the change.

“If you, who know so much, do not lead us, how can we live?” They all said to Ravindra with folded hands.

But finally, they all agreed to contribute their little, even by borrowing, if needed, and help him. Ravindra could not escape taking on the responsibility of performing the marriage. The wedding arrangements were made within their means. Rajesh, with his wife and children, came from Bombay four days before the marriage.

The younger brother-in-law, Sekhar came two days before the marriage. He brought money for the mangala sutra, the wedding cot, bed and blankets.

The marriage was celebrated observing all the wedding rites. Everyone was happy that an important celebration was accomplished. But Ravindra did not know how to repay all the debts he had made. He had a heavy heart. Padmavathi, though she was happy that the marriage was celebrated, was now worried as to how the debts should be cleared.

On the fourth day, all the friends and relatives left. The eldest brother-in-law stayed back with his wife and children. A week later they spread a mat and made Ravindra, and his wife sit on it. They congratulated them for performing the marriage of the youngest sister and offered them clothes and touched their feet in reverence. Ravindra and Padmavathi were happy that they were presented with clothes even when Rajesh was in great financial traits. 

Two days later Rajesh held both the hands of Ravindra.

“Dear brother-in-law, I’ll salute you and touch your feet any number of times. There is nothing wrong in doing so. You must educate my eldest son. Keep him in your house. The teaching at Bhivandi is not good. He is getting spoiled. I too don’t feel like living there. By next year I too will come away to these parts. You must find money for me to start a chicken center or some such shop here,” said Rajesh to Ravindra, explaining his miserable life with tears in his eyes. 

Ravindra felt distressed and pitied Rajesh, listening to his sad state. But he was already overburdened and did not know how to run his own family. Though he was kind at heart, he could not but speak harshly. Rajesh then confronted his brother-in-law with mixed feelings of pain and his own right.

“Yes. Brother-in-law! You helped your younger brother, also your younger sister. What did I receive from you? You educated my younger brother, and also my sister. But you did not extend any help to me. Won’t you at least educate my son? Let our lives get destroyed in this manner,” he said with tears, got up and went away swishing his towel in disappointment.

Rajesh visited the houses of acquaintances with his children for two days. Padmavathi, who observed her elder brother’s worry spoke out to her husband. “It is true. What help did he get from us? Let us take care of his son thinking that he was our own son. If that boy gets educated, his house will stand,” she said, tears rolling down her cheeks.

Ravindra had a mind to help Rajesh. But he had no financial support. Yet he could not but agree to do so. On the sixteenth day of the festival, Rajesh came with his wife and children. After celebrating the festival, he left the next day for Bhivandi leaving his son with Ravindra.

Padmavathi’s mother was very happy. “The hand that gives will not be idle. My daughter is the very goddess Annapurna,” she said in great joy.

Original Telugu published in Andhra Jyothy Telugu Daily, 05-06-2005