Random Thoughts

A Tale of Three C(sh)ities

The Delusional Reality of Medea

We are the na've yapper's radio, pompous blather blasting service and the fork-tongued times. We pontificate and prevaricate, but mostly we formicate the argument by giving you a mist of the matter. When you listen to or read us, we make you feel that you are a taught fool and dissent person. We skim the depths and make you believe you have probed. We give you fantasy knowledge and make you feel educated. We follow the lather of the low and practice our ethics with proper alley cat. We immerse you in litter-at-your pleasure. We tarnish your intellect till it glows with the sheen of pseudo-sagacity. Our compost verbiage generates the ideal milieu for your mental fermentation and stupefaction. We give you the prime elements of Satire, Humor, Intellectualism and Truth, till you reek of it. We beam or print our unadulterated material from the tower of babble in our patented programming language 'Psycho' till it reaches all our spaced out afflicted fans beyond the lunatic fringe. Our tormentors, amphigorists, ambushers, obfuscators and other stiff members who work as reporters can gore or bushwhack and prattle incessantly and inanely. The list includes:

Laissez Fairer
Dufus Gurgle
Left Fields 
Polluted Spigot 
Goofy Barker
Messy Liaison 
Dopey Blather 
No Refill
Tainted Nonsense 
Rubbish and Trashbin
Me Too Barf-Barf
Ham By-The-Ton
Faux Parts 
Bully Pistol 
Barmy Stutterer
Phony Ennui 
Cranky Drone 
Toxic Fume 
Damned Bore 
Shady Pompous Ass 
Trivial Satire 

and many other foundering bothers and blisters. 

Many are justly infamous, some notorious for their vicedom and have been pretenders and winners of the national kook award and the foolisher prize. All are richly undeserving and constitute the cream of the froth. They may constitute the third class, but are no worse than the other two messed up states; the ignoble ruling class and the immoral preaching class. I give them special attention because they should bring forth, nurture and love truth, instead they behave like their homonym Medea and murder truths, their children. Many are not spared the faults of the main characters of the other two Greek tragedies and practice intellectual cannibalism to further their career and have incestuous financial dealings with clear conflict of interest.

My spoof has serious implications. The journalists are the guardians of democracy and once they have been corrupted by money, fame or power, the very government and the ruling class, which is often devoid of character and integrity becomes a Frankenstein without control. The price is often paid by the whole nation in blood, sweat and tears and a rending of the very fabric of the nation, which needs generations to heal. It was for this reason that the founders of the American Federation of States gave the prime place to free speech. The nascent democracy they conceived was of checks and balances, and they did not wish it to become a democracy, that Plato equated with the rule of the rabble. This is why, they wanted a form of Platonic aristocracy and chose a house of representatives and an electoral college. They had been front seat spectators at that other monumental historic drama of liberty in France and saw how it was transformed into a free for all, uniform bloodbath. They also had enough memories of the historical irony of the happenings of the Thirty year war and of the Stuart dynasty, which brought different sects of Christianity to America, partially to escape their mutually intolerant oppression and thus opted for freedom of religion and separation of church and state. Above all, they were wary of kings and kingmakers. They never expected slavish sycophants, who would be selfish, self-absorbed and liberally tarnished with stupidity and cupidity. That was the prerogative of the elected politicians.

A D----D P(ox)US On Both Your Houses

The legislative and executive branches have shown complete disregard for decency as proven by campaign finance initiatives and the last election. They have shown a willingness to obsequiously kowtow to every contributor legal or illegal, citizen or alien. They have temporarily suspended ethical guidelines to fund party conventions and shown wanton disregard for norms of propriety by allowing incestuous mingling of campaign chests with retirement accounts of congressmen. Chairpersons of committees have ended their career in federal prison and had their sentences commuted for political reasons, while talking law and order. Political pardons have been dangled loosely from financial festoons and the White House run like a seedy bed and breakfast, with the seamiest action reserved for the oval office. The incestuous intermingling between lobbyists and the elected officials, with frequent crossing of the dividing lines and the revolving door between regulators (elected or appointed) and their regulated industries has made a mockery of ethics.

Atr(oc)eus Justice

The system of elected judges has led candidates held by a monetary leash, to give biased judgments and or reveal their philosophical leanings to ensure adequate financial support. Others merely desirous of five minutes of fame have ventured into judicial outfields and the appellate systems thrives on cannibalizing decisions, as the recent presidential election legal brouhaha, so unambiguously proved. The Supreme Court in a Christian country, which has had more than its fair share of pounds of human flesh, now seems bent on eating the flesh and soul of justice. Recurrent five to four groupings are not judicial decisions, but polling contests between ideological antagonists, with tyranny of a razor thin majority. 

Notes and references:

The writer is not dyslexic or dysphasic. All paraphasias(literal and phonemic) are deliberate, devoid of malice and all names are fictitious and the figments of imagination, bearing no relationship to any real or existent person.

Manufacturing Consent'The Political Economy of the Mass Media by Edward S. Herman & Noam Chomsky
The Selling of Free Trade by J. MacArthur
The Founding Brothers by J. Ellis        


More by :  Gaurang Bhatt, MD

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