As we are all aware that in today's scenario, parents are of different categories. The teacher always has to encounter two major hurdles. Let's talk about these two areas:
The reason is mainly because of the family background. The student's attitude is the outcome of his/her parents outrage. The negatively comments against the teachers and school in front of their wards. There are two types of parents:
1.Parents with high expectations
2. First generation Learners' parents
Nowadays they have No patience to listen, Even if they don't find the better option other than the same school still keeps on criticising. High expectations and zero cooperation or efforts of their own. Parents with high expectations want their child to excel in every field irrespective of their child's interest or potential. The child is all yours Madam, this is the tagline of them. Justifying their statement rather than listening teacher's point of view. We agree that most of the parents saying this...but if you touch the child they will ask. Surprisingly to some extent if the parent himself or herself is the teacher behaves in an eccentric manner. Yes and the second thing what the teachers are doing them if they are not doing their H.W or assignments given for completion or a project work should be completed. On the other hand we do have parents who don't know the value of education. Hence making them understand about the progress and seriousness of settling a goal for their children becomes very tough. Above all we do have helicopter parenting. Involving in each evey aspect of the child it becomes very difficult for the teacher to handle the situation. True. A teacher has to be firm but not rude. He/she needs to be friendly but not a friend. Another challenges faced by the teachers is that they take up too many roles (created by the school)
A teacher has to be a mentor, facilitator, social worker, counsellor - due to which she/ he is unable to focus on her/ his core strength - teaching. Demanding multi role tasking, nowadays, In some school she/ he should be dance, music, art teacher also.They are being accountable for more than they should or can do. In general the conflict areas between a teacher and parent:
When we take care the above conflict areas we can make them as a partner in our work.
Teachers have a feeling that the accountability which should be shared among all the four(Principal, teachers, students and parents) is vested on her/ him alone. This create a tensed atmosphere. If the school support the teachers under genuine situation, I think parents can be handled diplomatically. All these conflicts can be solved by only one component: that's Effective communication. In many school, teachers who don't know the native language find it difficult to communicate.
The greatest challenge, for both parents and teachers, is to effectively communicate. It may sound simple, but often conversations are disconnected because the teacher is using language that is specific to the field of special education, and may be unfamiliar to the parent. It is important that teachers make sure parents understand field specific vocabulary, such as accommodations versus modifications, at the beginning of a conversation. This will make sure there isn’t an inherent misunderstanding that could later cause problems.The teacher also needs to actively listen to the parent; it is so easy to get caught up in solutions and methods that teachers may miss feedback regarding what is most effective for the student.
Parents can help to ascertain which supports are working and which are not, and help to make changes that will impact success. True. Communication,(tone, modulation, stress of the word) is very important.
An example- "I didn't say she killed my dog". When we stress the word 'I' the meaning of the sentence is different. If we stress didn't ,then a different meaning. Likewise throw the stress on the different words, the meaning of the sentence changes.
Parents should never talk negatively about teachers to their children. If at all there is an issue pacify the child and then talk to the teacher in person not in the presence of the child. If at all the teacher is at fault talk to the teacher politely and sort out the issue ,because teachers are also human beings , they may make mistakes
True. That's the reason we do take orientation in the beginning of the year. And we do conduct parents workshop at times. Parents most of the time compare fees with marks...like we pay fees but marks are so less, Because controlling parents are not in Teacher's boundary. My question is why parents act like this? Can't they see the clear image of what's going wrong with their interference in the ward'S academics. There may be different reasons for pvt schools and Govt school
Not all parents behave likementioned, above. It also depends on the school's sambience, Teacher's attitude(carrying ourselves). Teachers also should have a code of conduct, while dealing with students and parents. We cannot please all parents, there may be criticism from some corner but face it with dignified approach. All the teachers should stand united to solve any issues amicably. There are definitely. But if the Teachers know that their head masters or Principal will support if she is right, she may not hesitate to answer firmly to the questions put across to her
Problem persist. Here since we are talking about the challenge faced by the teachers, I am mentioning from teachers' perspective. For pvt schools it's all about mindset of parents because during commercialization they expect school like service provider like other industry but schools are still behaving like social welfare Dept. Parents are paying so much to school that's why the want school to behave like other industry, schools are still stick on guru and shisya ideology after receiving big amount.
I strongly believe that pvt schools needs to change their mindset. Either you can guru or money maker, not both at a time. The reason is that their nature. Generally Teachers hate to interact with the parents of the following types:
- The Special Snowflake Parent
- The Magic Bullet Parent
- The Overhead Parent
- The Hovering Parent
- The Ghost Parent
- The No-Boundaries Parent
- The Competing Custody Parents
- The Boss Parent
- The Teacher-Hater Parent
- The All Drama Parent
All those who have children are not called Parents. Those who have strength to know the capacity capital of the children are true parents. As they pay the fees to the school, they do have the rights to ask questions, as they believe in, they act in such a way. The devastation in Education is not because of illiterate parents. It is all due to illtreated and mental illness parents. Uneducated parents are far better than the falsely educated Parents.
As mentioned above, such parents find it hard to understand others. They control their kids’ lives and make them feel as though they’re never good enough. Also, these parents feel that their children are responsible for their failures. They ignore their kids’ needs because they’re focused on their own.
Such parents are volatile. They are prone to throwing temper tantrums and blowing matters out of proportion. They can’t accept criticism and are unwilling to forgive. These parents are quick to judge others, but cannot take criticism themselves. They are also too reliant on their children to run errands for them. Such parents need their kids’ constant attention. They have low self-esteem, are self-centered and make unreasonable demands.
Conversely, emotionally mature parents can deal with their realities. They accept criticism and learn from their experiences. These parents look forward and are self-confident.
Disparity in expections and delivery
When parents become a real heros to their children, values in their Children also be grown.One thing you can notice, these parents are young.
I shall address all parents and our Faculty would sit in the first row exactly as Parents. In one and half hours, I would attend all their queries, I would alone face all their questions and grievances. As soon as you start listening their problems very seriously and write their points immediately in front of them in the dairy 98% cool down. Rest is the matter of words.I would instruct all parents very refined but decisive way - now go and meet teachers individually. But no disrespect and arguments. In case of disagreement, come to me directly and I would have the solution of all problems. Sympathy, apathy, empathy with determination would solve the problem.
1-2% will be real nuisance. I would directly tell them to take TC if they cannot comply with school's culture.
Education is much balanced process at school and home, either school or home alone cannot make it good result. Another good strategy for really disturbing problematic parents -
Ask questions that the child won't be able to answer, so that the parent would understand the situation clearly. Parents automatically will retract themselves and head will be down. They will immediately would be with me and child would not be able to manipulate his parents.But for that I would ask from lower grade. This is for really adamant and arrogant parents.It will be a 100% success.
But basis of all policy and strategy is - Satyameva Jayate. Without this no policy will work.
Many of the parents it’s a matter of prestige rather than the progress of the child. But few really does it with real focus their growth. Honesty, Integrity, Tenacity, Morality, Nationality and Spirituality should be our only identity - then parents will not see whether it is govt or private school - they will be always with us.
But some exceptional management and unique school leaders are there who leave such a good impact that people never forget.
What can we do to make majority positive? Only single answer - communication and motivation ... For that only way - Leaders are Readers. Leader must read at least two hours daily on leadership.
If you allow I can humbly mention what I read before my joining as School Leader and still reading ....Impart real education, deal without arrogance,make them feel that it’s a joint ventur. I would immediately explain the parents the real meaning of business. A venture must have financial profit but ethical and balanced.
Most of the parents have a feeling that its School vs parents. But we should assure that its always school and the parents