1. Get to know yourself. Your likes and dislikes will change with time. Some of you're still growing and searching for your identity. You're growing from a dependent relationship with parents into an independent life-style. Learn self-reliance and a healthy self-esteem before you enter into an interdependent relationship. Take time to accumulate wealth, get your education, pay your own bills, travel, and take care of yourself before you should think of relationship. The more patience and time you give to this development stage, the less likely you are to become a needy person emotionally or financially.
2. Always remember that no one relationship is completely fulfilling. Don't settle for half a person and try to make them whole. Don't go to the altar hoping to alter your spouse.
3. Learn how to communicate your feelings and goals. Help your mate to feel safe in communicating to you also.
4. Write down the goals, and values you seek. What are you ready to expect, accept and reject in a relationship?
5. Let true friendship be a building block for your relationship.
6. Be realistic in your approach. You may have to compromise in some issues.
7. You must heal your emotional "stuff" from the past relationship before you get into new relationship.
8. Don't have unrealistic expectations that one person can solve your problems, heal your pain or fulfill all your needs.
9. Healthy and loving relationships require honesty, hard work, quality time, serious commitment, inner love for each other, and loving and caring communication. You must adapt to "WE," attitude, not just "ME". attitude.