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Evidently

It’s evident. You feel a knot.
And evidently, I have loosened up.
Do you want me to hurt for you?
Would it make you feel better?
A ball of ignorance attacking you.
Smashes your teeth,
Cuts off the air you live through,
you lie through.
Send me waves of guilt trips.
I shouldn’t be getting on with my life.
Maybe I should be watching spools of me,
Depths of my skin open to the breeze.
I’m not like that.
I’m not like you.
You are not like you. You changed.
So what do you want from me?
Evidently, I have loosened up.
But I don’t run as free as you presume.
I never left my conscience
Tied to the main street bench.
Maybe. Finally the boat is moving.
Pushed out to sea.
But it took me long enough to get there.
Its not like I exhaled you
and swiped my soul a fresh,
wiped the slate clean.
I stabbed at organs, weary.
I thought sharp-ended eyelashes
would always steal my sight.
Evidently, you had an effect
And I don’t regret the experience
But maybe I would swap
The knowledge for the gun.
I would fire out like the bullet.
Trigger the free air
and land in a place where
I could be somebody else.

18-May-2003

More By  :  Chloe

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