Starved and famished,
I looked up to him
morsels of consolation
he offered me'
to the inconsolable me?
like breadcrumbs
to a beggar'
The pain goes away
comes back again,
like the everyday sun
shining and setting'
holding my tears
I try to smile
as much as I can'
to make 'everyone'
happy'
words freezing out
can't write as before
inexpressive to him,
inadequately so'
Sometimes, I do write
making him feel 'good'
lest he feels he's hurt me'
his silence did it all'
he never knew
I would be hurt that bad'
he couldn't care less,
he didn't love me; I did'
He was used to the girls
who never said a word
and accepted him,
for he 'listened' to them,
so he says'
yet never responded,
like he did to me'
asking me to accept him,
the way he was
It was difficult'
Plausible: I thought
and so I tried,
for the sake of love'
trying to be
like his 'other girls'
Failed miserably
ended up hurt,
my heart so bruised,
it never stops bleeding'
a gaping abyss
wrenching me out'
seeking 'closed doors'
I vent my anguish'
ceaseless tears that just wouldn't stop
the gash so deep'
will it ever fill up?
There is more to life than love
Get over it and Get over him
I helplessly wonder:
But How'?
The questioning continues'
So does the suffering'
I seek respite,
yet the pain clings back'
The days, the months, the years
of incessant longing
and deathly silence
have taken their toll'
a past with no future?
Forgiving is easy'
Forgetting? Never, ever'
